Not having the time of your life at university? You're not alone.
One university attendee used up much of his orientation week looking at online platforms, reading posts about other students' fun nights out.
"I remained in my room," Robert explains, describing the week as the most isolated period of his life.
The people he lived with seldom socialized, and his program didn't seem especially friendly.
Despite putting himself out there by attending trial events for various societies, he was unable to locate like-minded individuals.
"I started to lose my self-assurance," he says. "It seemed that people didn't want to form friendships with me, or they weren't fond of me."
Social Media Comparisons
Originally, Robert didn't plan of attending college and received employment offers for post-secondary education.
But then he watched his acquaintances enjoying themselves as university attendees on social media.
"When you need to wake up for work on Thursday at 9:00 and you see someone's been out on the previous evening, you do start thinking others have it better," Robert explains.
University Expectations
Media content and online platforms can idealize the notion of college existence.
Lots of people begin university with strong assumptions for what they think could be the most wonderful time of their lives.
Some students arrive at college with "rose-tinted glasses," says a counselling manager.
Study Outcomes
- In a poll of new students initially, the primary worry was finding their place and feeling included
- In another survey through polling organizations, 17% of students said they had no friends at university
- 37% said they experienced concern frequently about building relationships
Personal Journeys
Another student's social media content was populated with clips of girls having fun while living together in college residences.
But when she relocated from her hometown to university to study journalism, she found orientation period "intense" because of how much alcohol it involved.
She avoids drinking and had never been clubbing before.
"I actually passed much of orientation in my room," she says. "I merely sensed a bit alienated."
Emotional Wellbeing Factors
In a 2025 survey of more than 10,000 undergraduate students, a significant portion mentioned they contemplated withdrawing from studies.
The primary factor was their mental and emotional health, succeeded by economic considerations.
"Concern over these various aspects is extremely prevalent, and normal," explains a mental health professional.
Finding Solutions
With time, Robert, Alisha and Christina gradually adjusted and developed friendships.
Alisha made friends via her studies and using online platforms, while Christina felt happier when she could to share accommodation with peers.
Practical Advice
For Robert, now 24 and in his concluding studies, it was participating in theater activities and working occasionally that assisted in relationship building.
The suggested approach to beginning learners finding social interaction difficult is to venture outside your living space and go to club and society taster events.
"Following several weeks of regular attendance, people recognise your face," he mentions, "you become familiar with them, and friendships begin forming."
